If You Want To Stay Together, Learn To Fight Right: Fighting the right way

Introduction

Fighting is something that everyone does, but it doesn't have to be destructive. In fact, it can help you get closer with your partner if you fight the right way.

Set the scene.

• Choose a place to talk that is private and comfortable.

• Make sure you are both safe, and have time to talk without interruption or distraction.

Allow yourself and your partner to be heard.

The most important part of fighting is listening. When you're arguing with your partner, it's easy to get wrapped up in what you want to say next and forget that they have something important to say as well. But if you want to stay together, it's crucial that both partners feel like their opinions are valued by the other person.

When one person is talking and the other isn't listening--or worse yet, interrupting with an argument or accusing tone--there's no way for them both to feel heard at once! So instead of trying so hard not just for yourself but also for your partner: listen first before reacting; try not judging what they're saying (e.g., "I don't think this is true"); avoid making assumptions about what they mean ("Are we talking about X now?").

Make sure you can both speak freely.

This is crucial. You need to be able to speak freely without interruption, and you need to feel safe doing so. You also need to be able to say what you want to say without being judged or interrupted by your partner. And finally, it's important that neither of you feel like the other person is blaming them for anything that comes up during an argument--so much so that if either of those things happen (interruption or blame), it can throw off the entire conversation and make things worse than they were before.

So how do we make sure these conditions are met? First off: communicate clearly ahead of time about what kind of fighting style works best for both parties involved; then stick with it throughout the process! Another thing I find helpful is having a designated "fighting space" where one person doesn't mind getting yelled at while another person feels comfortable talking calmly in private; this way everyone gets their chance at being heard without feeling attacked by anyone else who might be around them at any given moment during an argument...

Don't interrupt, judge or blame--try to listen.

When you're in the middle of an argument, it can be hard to remember that listening is more important than talking. You might want to jump in and defend yourself or get your point across, but try not to interrupt or judge what the other person is saying. Instead, focus on understanding their point of view--even if it's different from yours. If you let them finish their sentence without interruption or blame, then they'll feel heard and understood (and hopefully less angry).

Then when it comes time for your turn at bat again: give yourself some time! Take a deep breath before responding so that way when you do speak up there won't be any heat behind what comes out of your mouth--just clarity and reasonableness (or at least as reasonable as possible given the circumstances).

Once you've opened up the conversation, take turns being the speaker and the listener (even if it means you have to switch roles several times).

If you are the speaker, it is important to listen. In other words, pay attention to what the other person is saying and react accordingly. If you don't understand something they are saying or if you want clarification on something they said, ask them for it! It's ok if there are times when one of you just needs a moment before speaking again--but remember that listening means actively engaging with each other's ideas and feelings without interrupting or dismissing them as irrelevant or illogical (even if those things aren't true).

Once both parties have expressed themselves fully and listened attentively during their turns at speaking, then it's time for some collaborative problem solving!

Be willing to compromise even when it feels hard or scary.

When you compromise, it's important to remember that your partner might not always agree with what you want. And that's okay! You can still show them that their needs are important by listening and trying to understand where they're coming from. Compromise also shows respect for the relationship and helps both people feel heard and understood--it makes it more likely that future arguments will end in resolution instead of stalemate or resentment.

Talk about what you can do together, not against each other.

When you fight, focus on the problem and not the person.

When you fight, focus on solutions and not blame.

When you fight, focus on what you can do together, not against each other.

Fighting is something that everyone does, but it doesn't have to be destructive

Fighting is something that everyone does, but it doesn't have to be destructive. Fighting is a way for two people to express their feelings and resolve conflicts. It can also help you grow closer together as a couple.

You need to learn how to fight right if you want your relationship with your partner or spouse to last long term.

Conclusion

Fighting is something that everyone does, but it doesn't have to be destructive. The key is learning how to fight right--and with so many couples breaking up today, it's more important than ever before! If you want your relationship to last, then fighting smartly is one way of ensuring that happens.