How to rebuild trust after cheating

Introduction

If you've cheated on your partner, then chances are they're not going to trust you after that. It's a big deal, and it really hurts. But you can rebuild trust after cheating—and that's what this guide is about: how to rebuild trust after cheating.

Open up the conversation.

  • Open up the conversation.

  • Discuss what happened, how it made you feel, and what you need from your partner to move forward.

  • Ask for forgiveness and help rebuilding trust.

  • Apologize for the pain and suffering caused by the infidelity or betrayal.

Take responsibility.

The first step to rebuilding trust after an affair may be the most difficult: you need to take responsibility for your actions.

It can be tempting to deflect blame and try to shift attention away from yourself, but doing so will only make things worse. First and foremost, acknowledge that what you did was wrong; it's not easy, but if your partner feels like they're being validated in their feelings, then hopefully they'll feel more inclined to move forward with repairing the damage.

Secondarily—and perhaps most importantly—acknowledge how your partner feels about what happened. This doesn't mean that you should apologize for what happened; rather, focus on acknowledging the pain that infidelity has caused them without taking responsibility for those feelings (which would only add insult to injury). Communicate openly about how this incident has changed or altered your perception of trust: whether or not it's possible for things between the two of you get back on track depends entirely on how honest each party is willing and able towards one another throughout this process.

Listen to your partner's needs.

One of the first things to do after cheating is to listen to your partner's needs. Do not make any assumptions about what they need. Do not tell your partner what they need, either. It's important that you don't try to be a therapist or counselor for your significant other right now—you're still trying to rebuild trust after cheating, and it's better if both of you can just be open with each other without trying to "fix" anything in particular.

Build a healthy foundation for your relationship.

Rebuilding trust after an affair usually happens over a long period of time. You're not going to be able to do it overnight, but it is possible to rebuild trust if you're willing to put in the work.

The first step is making sure that both of you are committed to the relationship and want it to work. This can be tricky because sometimes, one person may want out while their partner wants things back on track again.

If both sides are truly ready for this change, then there should be no problems moving forward with rebuilding your foundation together as a couple. It will require more than just good intentions though; you'll need some discussions on how exactly each party plans on doing this fine-tuning so that everyone feels heard and understood at all times!

Don't make the same mistake twice.

  • Don't make the same mistake twice.

  • Don't blame your partner for your actions.

  • Don't let guilt get in the way of rebuilding trust. It's not fair to punish someone for something that wasn't their fault, especially when they're trying so hard to rebuild trust and be honest with you now. If you feel guilty about cheating, try talking about it with a therapist or support group so you can move on from it instead of holding onto it forever or letting it ruin your relationship entirely.

  • Don't let yourself be manipulated by your partner—if they're trying to manipulate you into doing something that might make them look bad (like lying), don't give in! You need both parties working together with honesty and integrity if there's any hope of rebuilding trust

Rebuilding trust after cheating takes time, but it is possible.

Rebuilding trust after cheating is a process, and it will take time. While you can't force your partner to trust you again, there are things you can do to rebuild the trust in your relationship.

  • Communicate openly with your partner about what went wrong in the past and how you want things to change moving forward.

  • Don't blame or judge each other; instead, focus on learning from the mistakes that were made so they don't happen again.

  • Have open discussions about what behaviors need improvement in order for both parties to feel safe and secure within the relationship again (i.e., if one person needs more space than before).

Conclusion

We hope this article has given you some insight into how to rebuild trust after cheating. As we said before, there is no one way to do it. It’s important to remember that each relationship is different, and it will take time for everyone involved to recover from the damage done by infidelity. If you can start with simple steps like those outlined above and work your way up from there, then hopefully the process will be easier on both of you!

Nicholas Purcell

Nicholas Purcell is a couples counsellor and psychotherapist based in Adelaide, Australia. He works with couples seeking healthy, adult relationship.

http://www.nicholaspurcell.com.au
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How to stop feeling guilty after an affair

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Starting A Relationship From An Affair